When I read this piece, I instantly compared the attributes Newman described as a "gentleman" to emotional intelligence components I've studied.
Social skill - the ability to manage relationships and build networks. This is supported in the text: "The true gentleman avoids whatever may cause a jolt in the minds of those with whom he is cast; his great concern being able to make everyone at their ease and at home. (Page 563)
Self awareness - the ability to recognize and understand what drives moods, emotions and their effect on others - "He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort, he has no ears for slander or gossip. He interprets everything for the best. " (Page 564)
Empathy - the ability to understand your emotional make up and those of others - "He is patient, forbearing, and resigned on philosophical principles; he submits to pain, because it is inevitable; to bereavement, because it is irreparable, and to death because it is his destiny. (Page 564)
Self regulation - the ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods - think before you act. "He has too much good sense to be affronted at insults, he is too well employed to remember injuries, and too indolent to bear malice." (Page 564)
His holistic viewpoints seems to be characteristics we all try to demonstrate and perfect over a lifetime.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I like your definitions. I am definitely in agreement. I know a lot of people busy at work trying o perfect these qualities throughout their lives. It's difficult but worthwhile.
ReplyDeleteAngela,
ReplyDeleteNice job of selecting and commenting on specific passages from Newman's essay, and interesting tactic of connecting the quotations to current behavior.
I liked how you implied this informal text to the more formal realm of psychology and sociology. My favorite excerpt from this reading is that gentlemen do not involve themselves in "controversy" like "less educated minds" (564). "He may be right or wrong in his opinion, but he is too clear-headed to be unjust; he is as simple as he is forcible, and as brief as he is decisive" (564). Men and women definitely strive to follow these guidelines in life.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your definitions and agree with each of them. And if these are all acquired them one might have a better life overall.
ReplyDelete